Trying to decide on the reason which makes me come to the place I am at now if of no merit. For I could not vaguely remember nor recall the precise moment when I say "YES". Doing something that is so remote and unrelated to what my life nor interest had in place were of a scary thought. Yet, I stumble and fall along the way but never give up. I had consider rather seriously in the early days about quitting. Yet, something in the corner of my heart that makes me carry on. I wonder why...

Feeling like a lone ranger in the Pantanal looking hopelessly for any sign of civilization, hours and days passes by. Some felt like moments, others seem to hangs on for eternity. Hopping from one fazendas to another, always with the false hope of salvation. A mere ranch in the middle of nowhere, Bolivia perhaps? I do not know where will I be tomorrow, neither do I know where was I yesterday. The day were barely enough for its selfish own.

Was told that cappuccino can only be taken before 10, and that espresso were fine throughout the day, I would stick to my kopi kurang manis satu. Of maybe teh tarik for that matter, che chong fun were a big no no, yet clay pot yee min taste equally bland, perhaps pan mee? Am sick of it for now. Lobbying hard to have my name pressed in cold hard steel, one that I could proudly show to folks back home.

Another precious few moment wasted here, yet I know that this would not be the last, neither could I say when would I be back. Later? tomorrow? next week?...

ec audiendi qui solent dicere, Vox populi, vox Dei, quum tumultuositas vulgi semper insaniae proxima sit. (But they ought not be listened to who keep saying the voice of the people is the voice of God, for the restless mob ever approaches insanity.)

Moment

Listening to soft music, Yiruma.
Kindna reminds me of the past few days if not weeks, lots of thing that happened. Good and bad, sweet and sour. Although not all are worth mentioning, yet, they proven to be live's important lessons. My sight are getting poorer and poorer by the day, lasik surgery had not been convincing thanks to continual reminder by "experts" whose hear say evidence made a central part of their ratio decidendi and obiter dictum. Hate busy bodies once again, but with good faith (Bona fide). Been spending more and more time online lately, to read article, update facebook, and all those nonsense, then, the more I read the more I surf, it felt that as if I am addicted to the internet. Yet, no, I am not interested in the internet nor the PC, I am interested in the information in which I could access, every word, every click, every byte of information... Passion not addiction is my defense for this case. Many would say that this would be the most inappropriate time to spend so much time surfing the net while my finale is just around the corner. I understand and fread as much as the others but yet, I could not afford to lose that touch with the world around me that is so real, without borders. Perhaps this is just plain stupidity, perhaps this is just ignorance, but I like my life, I play hard and work hard. Work, can set me free, not blibical but it works for me.